Rep. Jamaal Bowman Dials 911 To Open Front Door to His Home
Sometimes you have to face a closed door before finding one that is open.
Yonkers, New York — Rep. Jamaal Bowman dialed 911 emergency line to get first responders out to his home to open his front door for him. According to various witnesses, the congressman was confused as to how to get the door open so he could relax after a grueling legislative session to avoid a government shutdown.
This development comes after Bowman elicited controversy when he pulled the fire alarm while the House of Representative voted on a series of measures intended to keep the government open.
“It was one of the most bizarre things I’ve ever seen,” said Johnny Applebaum, Bowman’s neighbor. “He just walked up to his door with a perplexed look on his face and immediately took out his phone and started dialing.”
He added: “He didn’t even try to open the door before getting his phone out.”
House Republicans derided Bowman for calling the emergency line for such a trivial matter. “I reckon if we spent half as much time on budget appropriations as Bowman does on figuring out doors and alarms, we’d have a surplus by now,” said Rep. Chip Roy (R-TX).
Democrats rallied to support Bowman, acknowledging the unique struggles he faces as a black congressman. Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-VT) chimed in, “In this era of unprecedented wealth and income inequality, it’s a national disgrace that some Americans still struggle to open doors.”
Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) proposed a rather interesting solution. “If doors are the barrier to progress, then let’s just remove all doors. Problem solved,” she said, noting that she has already introduced legislation banning front doors nationwide.
Others have put forth different solutions. “I’m introducing the ‘Open Door Policy Act’,” said Rep. Pramila Jayapal (D-WA). “This legislation will make door-opening lessons mandatory in all public schools.”
Rep. Thomas Massie (R-KY) said, “You’ve got to be kidding me. A guy calls 911 to open his front door and now we have to pass legislation addressing the issue? We are not a serious country right now.”
In a press conference Bowman called right after officers opened his door for him, he explained his actions:
“I saw a guy on Twitter highlight this problem perfectly. He pointed out that ‘white supremacy has closed so many doors for black people that most of us have forgotten how to open them.’”
“I have never seen a truer statement than that,” Bowman added. “As a nation, we need to focus on opening doors to healing and progress. There is no reason why a black man in America should have to worry about rifling through his keys to get into his own home.”
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